A recent Time Magazine article discusses the unseen life of Mother Teresa as one of internal struggle. It quotes some correspondence between her and others in the faith from a book recently written–the general spirit of which is that of doubt. For much of her life it appears that she struggled to sense the comfort and peace that comes from knowing a personal God intimately, questioning at times if He was even there. All of this at the same time as she was serving God by cleaning wounds of lepers and fighting poverty one person at a time on the streets of Calcutta.
Many are pointing to such doubts about her faith as some sort of hypocrisy, when really for most REAL Christians, doubt and struggle is a normal part of the Christian life. In the book of Mark, a father who brought his child to Jesus to be healed and cleansed of an unclean spirit expressed well such doubts by exclaiming “I do believe, but help me overcome my unbelief!” Thomas doubted and as extra-biblical sources claim went on to die a martyr’s death in and around India. Saint John of the Cross’s “Dark Night of the Soul” has been studied and quoted for centuries because of it’s focus on the very same struggle and was what Pope John Paul II wrote his doctoral dissertation about. David Brainerd, a missionary to American Indians who was made famous by Jonathan Edwards’ publishing of his diaries, wrote often about his melancholy demeanor and struggle to sense the peace of God on his life. Even today REAL christians who would seek to glorify God with their life seek and struggle desperately to have some sense of intimacy and joy in knowing God–something John Piper has written a great book about called “When I Don’t Desire God”.
So it’s pretty normal to struggle. Mother Teresa wasn’t the first to do so and won’t be the last. As the Catholic Church is going through the process naming her a Saint, whatever that is, this should stand as a reminder that people who are viewed by history for doing great things for the Glory of Christ are no different than you and me–at least in that they too struggle to know God. The key as Mother Teresa has shown us, is to fight through the doubts to seek the Joy that comes from knowing and serving Christ. Struggling with doubt to seek to know God intimately means that you believe there is something that you have tasted in knowing God that is well worth fighting for–even if it takes you a lifetime.
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